Thursday, March 25, 2010

My days, in Tadika Seri Soka


Tadika Seri Soka, Im proud to be the first batch student ... This place really reminds me lots of my kindergarden precious moment..haha..but everything seems to be so small now..(small chairs, small tables, toilets ><...lol as if i were in the movie "Alice in the wonderland" :p


Its good to be back, for good..

I decided to go back, to contribute, because I heard that they're really short of ppl in tadika.. And Im now having holiday til may before I start my course..so why not? :)

Everyday 730am to 130pm.. At first I was like..wow ><>
First day of "work", lol.. other teachers were very very busy, I was told which class I will be assisting, then "poof", the person was gone and I was alone><...then was figuring out what can do to help them..




So happened that I saw this small boy crying ..very loud .. (oya, all the kids are really "tiny" over there...like "handle with care" type ><...so cute wei..hahaha)

So I walked up to him, I introduced myself and asked him what happen..he was crying at the same time telling me something , very very long..but I couldnt understand ><>

I tried to tell him its alright, be good boy, dont cry, and hug him..
When the class started, teacher Lindy(my class's eng teacher) called him and asked me to bring him to class...(ooo! this boy is in my class , bunga daisi ^^ hahaha)..
Then throughout that whole day, he kept following me, very manja><

Everyday the kids end class at 12pm..Then after the hug hug bye bye with the kids, I have to rush to the girls toilet..There are groups of 4 to 6 years old girls will be staying back for day care, so we have to bath them..:p..haha ofcos we have 2 aunties to shower the girls, me and another teacher just to monitor them, help them to dry the hair, wear cloths sometimes.. wow! This's really something I nv did before..:)


They are mostly so called bit "out-of-control" kids..are here for day-care cos some of them are very notty, maybe its because they're lack of love(parents busy working), or too manja.. According to the teacher while monitoring the girls, she said that kids that stay back for day-care, everyday they're getting better..cos they have friends, teachers to guide them.. :)

The first week I was really not used to it..Because taking care of kids , you really need alot of "energy" ><.. As in you need energy to control ur tempor, haha be patience, and to chase after kids sometimes><..haha its very very tiring, felt so so sleepy and restless when I drove back ..I nearly fell asleep while driving back once ><..and it was so dangerous man..but now are gettin better.. :)
Many of my friends, were very shock when I told them that I'm helping in tadika, in cheras(so far????!!! ) and it a voluntary work(what?? no pay??) Haha, they said why not just get a job with salary? why so stupid and stuff..

Well, I guess they just don't understand, life's great when you can find something that you can contribute to ppl, society.. In this busy city, when we are all fighting hard for our own stuff,only..dont you feel tired?.. It might seem stupid to be such selfless, or so unrealistic..but is it true? how can you tell, if you never try before? You said it through your own experiece? or by following what "other ppl" saying and thinking...?

Yes, its tiring, no money, ...but I gain more in the end...

At first I was just thinking to contribute there since I have time, and its tadika seri soka man! I used to study there^^

But now, after working for few weeks there... I realised that everyday over there is a challenge for me..
Everyday Im dealing with the kids, and everyday they are actually training my character, as a human..
Right here, the teachers don't beat or scold the kids.. If some of them really out of control, like hit other kids, make other kids cry, dont wanna share their toys , snatch ppl's things, don't listen to teachers..and etc.. Teachers will only bring them to another side, talk to them..maybe at the begining scold..but sure will talk to them, as in dialogue with the kids.. Here, I see the respect for kids, from the adults(teachers).. I think its becos our founder of tadika seri soka, Daisaku Ikeda, holds the same principle too, for ppl..




So now Im doing the same thing too, I dialogue with the problematic kids..Ppl might think its hard to talk to them or doubt that will they ever understand what you say? But they do understand, they will slowly change..even they are only 4 years old(my class)... but ofcos, this need everyday's effort ..


I've learnt alot, and I'm learning more.. polishing myself everyday...Wish me luck with the kids..^^ and I will continue to gambate :) .. FIGHTO!!!






Sunday, March 7, 2010

生命的自由

八个月了....好像过了很久,但也好像是一眨眼的事...好像过了很久,是因为我们变得很不同了...好像一眨眼,是因为时间真的过得很快.... 有时时间的不留情,真的可以疗伤,同时也可以看清自己...

觉得,你跟她应该过得很好吧...放心,我不是放不下,也不是在留念..我也过得很好...

只是昨天参加了很久都没开的青年广布第二幕会,想起以前不断拼命鼓励你去开这个会,也不断和你分享开会的喜悦,希望你也能拥有这份感动和喜悦....但不能吧? ...境堐时而好时坏的你,有时很抗拒,所以也很压力吧? ...有时在想,她不是学会人,也许你会比较自在吧...

但无论如何,离开你之后,路真的不好走..除了自己的情绪以外,遇到满多想欺骗自己的人..那时候的我,一直停留在怀念以前的保护区里,一直不肯前进...每天过着以泪洗脸,失眠的夜晚...那时候的脸色,谁都被我吓到...幸好,我一直都有同志们,姐妹们的支持,seniors 的指导下,通过题目,来overcome所有的fundamental darkness......

昨天在广布第二幕会上,看着池田先生的video,感到非常感动,也很感激..因为我还在学会里,我还在会里跟随着池田先生,和其他的青年一起认真地探讨人生..
一时也会回头望,看看你有没有出席会议..果然没有..真遗憾,希望你不要再给自己借口,放弃学会吧..离开学会,就是离开幸福的轨道...


我很享受,现在的我..每天都把握能鼓励身边的人的机会,有我的地方,一定要有希望..每天不停地提醒自己,要把这涌入在我的生命里...最近领悟到培育后继者的重要, 无论是在鼓笛队里,还是学会, 今后会从新出发!!


我,一定要,每天都能证明恩师的伟大...


不管有没有人看到,都一定要发光发热...就好像月亮,无论是否有乌云遮盖,它都一样地在黑夜里发出温暖的月光.



现在的我想追求的,是生命的自由...:) ...
追求一个不被痛苦迷惘束缚的生命.. 无论有多困难, 都可以无限地创造幸福的人生..
这, 就是生命的自由...